Struggling Along
I’m still struggling to find motivation for the 365 Project. It feels like the urge to give up is there everyday now. I’ve found taking a fair amount of shots on one day then spreading them out has eased the pressure a little. Okay, it’s cheating to an extent, it is a still a picture posted everyday though. Honestly, the way my head is at the minute, going out each day is the last thing I want to be doing. However good it may be for me.
I understand getting fresh air and walking is good for your mental health. Sometimes though, staying in and (attempting) to relax is also a good option. Sometimes even the thought of opening the door and bumping into whoever sends a shiver down my spine.
There’s been so many moments over the past couple of weeks where I have felt so useless, and not good enough. It has spurred me on though. I’ve made a couple of breakthroughs both photography wise and generally. I feel like my black and white shots have got better, now I’ve got some sort of proper technique, I understand a bit better what I’m supposed to do.
The other thing is maths related, I’ve never been good at maths. I hate the subject with a passion, numbers often blur into a mess with me. However, today I actually managed to do some calculations involving fractions. Yes, this doesn’t seem like much but for someone who nearly cries at the sight of numbers, it’s a huge deal. I did my GCSEs 10 years ago. This is the first time I feel like I actually get something major. Here’s to hoping I don’t forget it all!
– R